Wednesday, May 8, 2013

The 8 Types of Parties..

Last night on Twitter #onetimeataparty was trending. Naturally this got me thinking of back in the day when (underage) house parties were cool. I decided that there were/are 8 types of house parties.

The Party when your parents are out of town
My parents went out of town a lot. Business trips, vacations away from the kids, etc. When I turned 16 my parents became very trusting. Instead of staying at grandma's with the rest of my siblings, I was granted permission to stay home alone. Guys, my parents weren't stupid or naive, I really think they just trusted me. Which makes me feel a little bad about what I'm about to say. I had so many of these parties.

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These are the types of parties where the host (aka YOU) spend the whole night freaking out. Trying to keep the noise down. Making sure you neighbors (in my case, my grandparents! yes, i was a very brave soul) don't notice all of the cars in the driveway. Cleaning up every spill the minute it happens. Keeping everyone out of your parents room. Making sure the pukers were outside or in the bathroom. These were the stressful parties. I rarely got drunk, if I even drank at all. I usually just spent the whole night as a spazz and the next morning cleaning like a freak. Hoping Mom wouldn't question why I decided to vacuum the entire house while she was gone since I refused to vacuum anything while she's home.

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The Party when your friends' parents are out of town
These parties are way better than the above parties. Mostly because you're not the one who has to worry about getting caught or cleaning up a mess. I was lucky enough to have a group of friends whose parents also went out of town a lot. Lots of trusting parents in my town, I tell ya! Some of my best memories from high school were made at these parties. I went, I drank, I got drunk, I passed out, I woke up, I went home. Done.

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The Party when all of your friends are 21 and you're not
These parties are good and bad. First of all, your friends are 21, so getting alcohol is no problem-o. Make a list, send 'em to the store. Super. But, unless you have at least one other friend that is underage with you, it sucks. Typically the "of-age" people will get drunk, stay until 11pm, and then head to the bars. Do you know what's not fun? When your at a party of 30 people and you go to the bathroom and come back out and there are 5 of you left. Yea, not fun.

Also the "of-agers" tend to obnoxiously remind you that they're too old for house parties now and they'll be leaving soon to go to the bars. Thanks sweetie.

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The Awkward Party
This party has 3 potential kinds of awkward..
a) You don't know anyone except the person you came with and he/she knows everyone else there so you're standing alone in the kitchen pretending to text someone.
b) You were once friends with everyone there, you had a falling out with one bitch girl and now everyone is just staring at the 2 of you wondering who's going to confront the other one first.
c) Your ex boyfriend or girlfriend is at the same party.. with their new significant other. Always awkward.

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The Party where you get caught
This is the party where after years of successfully not getting caught by your parents in high school, you're helping your little sister out and BAM.. Mom walks in. Busted.

The Birthday Party
Either you're the birthday girl/boy and you're getting drunk because duh, it's your birthday OR you're getting drunk because you're celebrating your best friends/random acquaintance/bitch you hate's birthday. Either way, everyone is drunk. 

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The Party you don't remember
You came. You drank. You blacked out. You wake up confused. 

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The Party where you're house sitting
This goes back to my apparent trustworthy high school self. I was asked to house sit a couple times. Only once did I have a SMALL party. Homeowner even knew and totally didn't care. She rocks.

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But my best guy friend in high school house sat. Let's just say we ended up drinking their liquor (huge fully stocked bar) and then filled the bottles back up with water or watered down coke. We forgot to let the dog out. Someone had sex and people walked in. Just bad news all the way around.

The Party when you're finally 21
Finally, FINALLY you're 21. You have a party at your house/apartment to celebrate. You go purchase the alcohol by yourself. And you figure out quickly.. this isn't cool anymore. Let's go to the bars.

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Agree? Disagree? I could probably think of a couple more, but I've scared my parents enough for one blog post.

OH, follow me on Twitter, Instagram, and Pinterest! Love you, love you guys!
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1 comment:

  1. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH i am so in love with this!!

    it is so so so true!!
    i have partook (correct word usage?)

    in all these except the house siting!


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